Crafting a compelling personal statement can be a challenging task, but understanding its structure and purpose is key to success. In this article, we will decode a sample personal statement, break down its components, and provide you with a clearer understanding of what works and why. Whether you’re applying for college, scholarships, or university, these insights will help you write a more effective and impactful statement.
Outline
Select Your Area of Study
Identify Your Area of Study: In this personal statement, the applicant clearly identifies their area of study as science. However, simply stating your field is not sufficient. It’s important to narrow your focus to a specific area within science.
Narrow Your Focus: Choose a specific subfield within the area of study that aligns with your interests. For example, the applicant references laser technology and electromagnetics, which are narrower fields within science. By narrowing down your area of study, you also demonstrate basic knowledge or familiarity with the subject, which is essential.
Demonstrate Knowledge: Expressing interest is not enough. Show that you have a clear understanding of the field you are applying for. You can do so by explaining how you’ve engaged with the field, such as through completing a coursework, doing a research, attending conferences, or reading books. Mention your recent developments to show possess basic knowledge of your selected field. This demonstrates that you’re not just expressing interest but have actively engaged with what excites you about the field.
Support with Evidence: Strengthen your statement by providing solid evidence of your engagement with the field. This could include:
- Academic achievements, research, or coursework related to the area of study, or
- Relevant work experience, such as internships, jobs, or projects you’ve been involved in, or
- Any extracurricular activities or volunteer work that demonstrate your commitment to the field.
Note: Now that you know to demonstrate your knowledge, can you point out how the applicant in the below sample personal statement is demonstrating knowledge in the selected field? Key hints are academic and employment achievements.
Show Who You Are
Avoid Personal Stories to Excite Emotions: Avoid focusing too much on personal stories of hardships, such as economic struggles, migration, or experiences with conflicts. While these are significant events, they are not unique to you. Every person faces challenges in life, so these stories alone won’t set you apart. A selection committee member may sympathize with your situation, but they won’t make their decision solely based on emotions. Instead, they will focus on your skills, achievements, and how you align with the program.
Include Personal Stories to Highlight Growth: Include personal stories only if they show how these experiences helped you gain skills, shaped who you are, or changed your perspective. Focus on how they contributed to your growth, helped you become the person you wanted to become, and prepared you for the future. Rather than recounting hardships, show how they made you stronger and more resilient, ready for the program’s challenges.
Show Who You Are as a Student: Focus on who you are as a student, not just as an ordinary citizen. Highlight your academic journey, intellectual curiosity, and the skills you’ve gained. Discuss how you approach challenges in your studies and what drives you in your field. Show how your experiences have shaped you as a dedicated student, ready for the future.
Note: Can you see that we do not know about the personal hardships this applicant has gone through, but we know him as a student, his works, his achievements both as a student, and an employee, his knowledge.
Highlight Your Career Goals
Clarify Your Career Ambition: Your career aspiration should not come out of nowhere. It should be rooted in your past education, past employment experiences, and future aspirations. Your goals should reflect a clear, logical progression from what you’ve already done as an employee, what you have studied as a student, to what you aspire to become or do. Each stage should contribute to shaping your career goals.
Set Achievable Career Goals: Your career aspiration should be logical and achievable. You cannot bring peace in Afghanistan, you cannot end corruptions in America, or you cannot change the society; avoid these general goals. Be realistic. Set achievable career goals.
Logical Career Path Examples: For someone studying TESOL, a logical role could be an English teacher at a school or university. A digital marketing student might aim to become a digital marketing consultant to help companies maximize their online presence. An AI student could pursue a career to develop AI solutions for businesses. For an IT student, a suitable role could be an IT support specialist or network administrator and so forth.
Note: Doing a PhD seems like an unrealistic goal for this applicant, especially when the applicant is just beginning his/her graduate studies. The applicant’s employment as technical lab assistant and education in engineering aligns well; however, these experiences do not align well with a career in R&D, since R&D is often more business-oriented than a field suited for an electrical engineering graduate.
Explain Why You?
Show You are Unique: Demonstrate why you are the ideal candidate. This samples gives at least three reasons why the applicant is unique.
- Taking calculus at college level and earning an A in that class while the applicant is only a high school student is a great example to show why the applicant is unique.
- Moreover, taking a graduate level course while the applicant is a mere undergraduate student is another great example.
- Yet another great example that shows why the applicant is unique is that the management asked him to come back after he is done with his studies.
Note: All of this is a clear explanation of why you. Therefore, the selection committee can have multiple reasons why to prioritize or select this applicant over other candidates.
Research
Research about the school or the program you want to study, here is how.
Explore Faculty Profiles: Look into faculty members’ research interests and publications. Identify professors whose work aligns with yours and consider undergraduate research opportunities.
Review Specific Courses: Check how the courses match your career goals or projects. Ensure the curriculum prepares you for your future plans. Explain how a course can help you achieve your dream job or help you achieve a goal or better prepares you for your future.
Personal Recommendations: Find out if mentors or professionals in your field have recommended the school.
Investigate Resources and Opportunities: Research the school’s labs, industry connections, and facilities that can support your academic and career development.
Consider Your Contribution: Think about how you can contribute to the academic community, not just what the school offers.
Note: The applicant has not researched well about the school or the program of his study. There is a plenty of room to develop this area.
Sample Personal Statement
My interest in science dates back to my years in high school, where I excelled in physics, chemistry, and math. When I was a senior, I took a first-year calculus course at a local college (such an advanced-level class was not available in high school) and earned an A. It seemed only logical that I pursue a career in electrical engineering.
When I began my undergraduate career, I had the opportunity to be exposed to the full range of engineering courses, all of which tended to reinforce and solidify my intense interest in engineering. I’ve also had the opportunity to study a number of subjects in the humanities and they have been both enjoyable and enlightening, providing me with a new and different perspective on the world in which we live.
In the realm of engineering, I have developed a special interest in the field of laser technology and have even been taking a graduate course in quantum electronics. Among the 25 or so students in the course, I am the sole undergraduate. Another particular interest of mine is electromagnetics, and last summer, when I was a technical assistant at a world-famous local lab, I learned about its many practical applications, especially in relation to microstrip and antenna design. Management at this lab was sufficiently impressed with my work to ask that I return when I graduate. Of course, my plans following completion of my current studies are to move directly into graduate work toward my master’s in science. After I earn my master’s degree, I intend to start work on my Ph.D. in electrical engineering. Later I would like to work in the area of research and development for private industry. It is in R & D that I believe I can make the greatest contribution, utilizing my theoretical background and creativity as a scientist.
I am highly aware of the superb reputation of your school, and my conversations with several of your alumni have served to deepen my interest in attending. I know that, in addition to your excellent faculty, your computer facilities are among the best in the state. I hope you will give me the privilege of continuing my studies at your fine institution.
(Stelzer pp. 38-39)
This example can also be found on the Purdue University and the Western Illinois University websites.
Download sample personal statement
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